Friends, let's face it – accepting compliments can be as elusive as finding your keys in a massive handbag. But why do we, as fabulous women, sometimes struggle with this? Firstly, society has done a number on us by teaching that modesty is a woman's best accessory. We're supposed to keep our awesomeness under wraps, right? Wrong! We've been conditioned to believe that accepting compliments might make us seem like divas, but let's flip the script and wear that praise like a crown. Are you with me?
Next, there’s that that little (often too loud) voice inside our heads – you know the one that sometimes whispers, "Do I really deserve this compliment?" It's time to kick that self-doubt to the curb, queens. You are worthy of every compliment that comes your way. So, embrace the applause and channel that main character energy. With all of that said, I know how hard and uncomfortable that this can be. So, these are two things that I have found to be helpful.
Thank you AND. This is one I have started using the most lately and has been so helpful. As a member of a team and someone who tries to lead by lifting others, I do not want to take credit for something that was the success of the village. However, I do not want to downplay the role I have played. I used to say “thank you but I really could not have done it without x, y, z. Now? I say “Thank you so much AND I also want to give credit to x, y, z. This small reframe shares the kudos but it also helps me celebrate my wins too.
Thank you instead of I’m sorry. We are ALWAYS apologizing. Stop it (unless you actually mean it). When we are late, when we are scattered, when we are simply doing the best we can, we are apologizing. No more. Let’s change it into gratitude. Rather than “I’m sorry I am late” say “thank you so much for waiting”. Rather than “I am so sorry my house is a mess” say “thank for being someone I can be myself around, including my messy, normal home”.
These two small changes have had big impacts on my day to day life. Here’s the thing, whatever you say, you are listening to. Start speaking kindly to yourself, too.
~Lisa
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